Flying Grievances

I guess I should start off this post by saying that I have never really had any issues with flying. My parents first brought me on a plane when I was really young and I have never been nervous or annoyed by the nuisances that come with traveling around in the big winged vehicle. Turbulence has never really scared me and I guess I’ve always figured that if we crashed, it would be quick and I would have no control anyway. Post-9/11 security is what it is, I have a fairly good routine down with my shoes, electronics, coats, etc. and I just try to be patient as I get through.  I love the fact that you can get from point A to point B faster than driving (particularly when there is an ocean separating the two points) and I think AirTran’s latest venture into in-flight WiFi is probably the coolest thing an airline has done in awhile.

But …

(The president of my mom’s seminary once told her that, “Everything before the ‘But’ is bullsh**” - if that gives you any idea of where this post is going.)

… flying has become more and more of an annoyance.

Between my trip two weeks ago and Bruce and my trip this weekend, I have a few grievances I would like to share with the blogging world.

Grievances Regarding AirTran
- I understand that having to cancel a flight due to weather makes scheduling complicated. But please don’t bump me off of a flight I booked two months ago to accommodate those that were cancelled the day before.
- If a plane lands and the gate it is supposed to go into is occupied by a plane that is having technical troubles (but full of people and therefore unable to move) please at least keep the air on in the plane unable to get to its gate and stuck on the tarmac.
- If said plane is stranded on the tarmac for an hour and fifteen minutes (yes, I said one hour and fifteen minutes), not only would it be nice to have the air on, it would also be nice to hand out some drinks and consider letting people get up to use the restrooms.
- Please stop making it seem like you are helping out in these tough economic times by offering “complimentary XM radio and headphones” and “free coffee at the gate” (even though I’ve never actually seen coffee there) when you are charging me excessive fees to check one bag. Call a spade a spade – you want more money.
- If you have a flight scheduled to leave at 6:28, perhaps start the boarding process before 6:15. When has it ever taken 15 minutes to get a 747 full of people onto the plane, carry on items stored and everyone safely in their seats?

Grievances Regarding Westchester County Airport
-If a plane is having technical troubles is stuck at the gate, please reroute the planes trying to get into its gate somewhere else. People get cranky when they are stranded on the tarmac for an hour and fifteen minutes and their rides home are restlessly texting/calling them.
-Try to find a way to not schedule your flights to all take off within 5 minutes of one another. Your two-gate terminal is entirely too small to have five flights worth of people waiting together in it.
-Please put a credit card machine at the café in the terminal. I rarely carry cash and find it annoying to not be able to use plastic to buy a bottle of water and a snack once I’m through security.
-If you do find yourself in a position where you have five flights worth of people waiting in your two-gate terminal, please turn the air conditioning on.  More bodies = heat.

Grievances Regarding My Fellow Flyers
- When you are planning a trip where you are going to need a fairly full suitcase, try to budget in enough money to pay to check your bags. Yes, it is a stupid fee, but it takes twice as long to get everyone on the plane when every single person is rolling something down the isle.
- Please don’t try to give yourself more room by putting up the armrest in between yourself and me. Do you remember Dirty Dancing? “This is your dance space and this is mine” – This is my seat and this is yours.
- FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS – Cell phones interfere with satellites (ever wonder why your radio explodes if your phone rings while sitting next to it?). Please don’t text while we are landing.
- FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS – If the plane lands and pauses before it gets to the gate, don’t get up and start digging through the overhead bins. The flight attendants won’t let the pilot start moving again until you sit down.
- Question: Why do you all insist on standing and flooding the aisles as soon as the seatbelt light is off? The door to the plane isn’t even open yet.
- When getting off the plane, it makes the most amount of sense to let people get out one row at a time, starting at the front and working your way back. If you are more towards the back, please don’t try to push your way up, it just crowds the aisles and everyone gets stuck.

I think that’s it for now.

(Bruce and I just got back from our long-weekend in Connecticut. Despite the frustrations on the traveling front, it was a great trip and I am so glad we were able to get up for my dad’s show. I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way!!)